Last weekend I was sitting in a pizza place with my Mother when we noticed two very quiet children at the table across from us. It seemed like such an odd thing to me to see children under the age of ten quietly eating pizza. I had no idea this was possible but then I saw it. Both children were playing on their very own iPads.  You could tell by the covers that these were not Mommy or Daddy’s toys. These children had five hundred dollar toys. This made me giggle because I had just purchased a Nook for myself. I argued with myself for over six months before I made this reckless splurge. Yes, I’m forty-ish and I am finally responsible enough to own a toy that costs half of what those children were playing with. Oh dear, I am jealous of another child’s toys.  It was the green eyed monster rearing its ugly head.

When I was little, my favorite toy was my “Baby Alive”. Well, for a little while. I was fickle. Baby Alive could eat her own special food and make poop in her diaper. Sometimes she would get constipated though and I would ram a coat hanger up her hiney to dislodge the hardened “food”.  It was a five year olds idea of an enema. I had to do something. She would die if she couldn’t continue eating! Yep, I thought she was real. Even though she was real to me I never saw a problem with my method for relieving her constipation. Maybe this is why God didn’t allow me to have children?

On my sixth birthday my Mother gave me my first Barbie after I had a screaming, crying and wailing fit. It wasn’t my fault though. My Mother had made a grave mistake. When handing me my gifts she had gotten them out of order. I quickly unwrapped Barbie Doll clothes and even a pink Barbie Doll carrying case. I then proceeded to cry rivers because I had all of these Barbie things but I didn’t actually own a Barbie. Ok, so I wasn’t the sharpest pencil in the box. Momma managed to salvage the day by finding the box with Barbie in it. I think I’m still scarred from the devastation that was bestowed upon me.

Looking back I think I pretty well had it made with my collection of toys. I may not have had a five hundred dollar toy but unlike my husband, I did not have to save the corn cobs from supper to make log trucks with either.

11 thoughts on “Toys!!

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