If you can’t say something nice then use sarcasm.

My Mother says I have to write something nice today. She’s putting rules on my blogging now. I’m not supposed to talk about any of her weird habits or wild adventures. Nope, I can’t tell you about the time she hit a parked car. No more talking about her driving through funeral processions or swerving to miss dead possums and barreling into a tree.  No, I will only tell the good things.

Do you hear crickets? I hear crickets. …

Plant SaverOh, I know! She once saved a poor defenseless office plant. The poor thing was stuck in the corner of a stair well in an ugly little pot. No great shafts of sunlight or little lady bugs to pollinate it. The great Colleen could not possibly stand for that! With coffee in hand she stood at the top of the stairs. Showing no regard for her own safety she thought only of that poor little plant as she tossed herself down a flight of stairs and cracked that ugly pot with her head. Sure there was a little time in the emergency room but that plant was saved from a horrible fate! It received a brand new pot and was placed in a nice sunny area. Such a martyr she is.

 

11 thoughts on “If you can’t say something nice then use sarcasm.

  1. Ramblings Mom

    You my dearest and only daughter are dead meat, hamburger!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    I will get revenge somehow, someway, someday!!!!
    The gauntlet has been thrown down!!!!!!

    Reply
      1. Ramblings Mom

        Just remember you get more like me EVERY DAY!!!! Revenge is only a few years away. Trouble is that I will not know it as my memory will probably be gone!!!

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